Fiona Apple Shares She’s “Really Struggling” with Writing About the “Endless Barrage of Horrors”

Singer-songwriter Fiona Apple shared how her music-making process has been going in an Instagram post, describing “sudden urge to reach out.” The video was posted by her friend and roommate, Zelda Hallman. In it, she shares how writing music has been difficult for her with current events, as reported by Consequence.

“I wonder if you’re wondering if I’m even trying to write about what’s going on in the world right now,” she said. “I just wanted to tell you that I am. I’m trying. I’m really struggling with it.”

She went on to describe how writing about yourself is simpler because there’s no one who can tell you that you’re wrong about your own experiences, you can’t let people down, and you’re the authority. Apples describes how when the subject matter broadens to others or the world, it becomes “so important,” and there’s some uncertainty that comes with it.

“Now, with this fucking endless barrage of horrors, it’s hard to focus,” she shared. “And when you do focus, I just keep second and third and tenth and millionth guessing myself if I’m the one to say it or if I’m saying it right.”

Apple didn’t want people to mistake her absence or silence for her “turning a blind eye” or not caring. “I just don’t want to let anybody down,” she said. “I’m letting myself down right now, I know that, as an artist, because I feel like that’s our job.”

The Instagram video’s caption offered more context on where Apple’s head has been and what things she’s been struggling to write about.

The caption reads: “Fiona gave me this video to share. She’s been trying to find a truthful way to speak to the enormity of what’s happening in the world, from the horror in Gaza and Sudan, to the cruelty being aimed at trans kids, to the assault on women’s bodily autonomy, to the abuse and terror being inflicted on immigrants and their families, to the erosion of voting rights and civil liberties, to the disappearance of Indigenous and Black children, so often met with silence, and to so much more suffering and injustice than can be named or addressed in a single statement. This is where she is.”